炎亚纶回忆初中被霸凌泪崩:阴影始终没有离开过
时间:2018-10-12 08:02:17阅读:55140次来源:全集追剧网 1/2
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炎亚纶
据台湾媒体报道,炎亚纶过去是男团飞轮海成员,单飞后也在戏剧圈大放异彩。他近日接受专访,大谈2015年那段,因地震说被网友炮轰嘲讽的低潮,和鲜少在外界面前公开的脆弱面,原来从美国回台湾念初中那段时间,是他人生最黑暗的时期,更一度泪洒镜头前。
炎亚纶接受媒体专访,大谈一路走来的心路历程,14岁那年因父亲在美国的工作结束,返台后他进入台湾的初中就读,从西方自由环境,转换到东方的高压教育,他一度无法适应,光是要在教室内,坐好坐满45分钟,都是种折磨,光是在课堂间起身舒展,都会被投以异样的眼光。他为了融入团体,开始强迫自己适应:“我告诉自己不要再站起来了,再忍一下就下课。”
无奈,炎亚纶的所有努力,在看到自己的书包,被丢入垃圾桶,课本有如破抹布般,被同学丢来丢去的那一刻,这些苦心堆砌的心理建设,瞬间化为泡影,他被问到,是否曾想轻生,他未置可否,坦言当时心里的不甘心达到极点,不断自问:“我做错什么事,为什么你们要这样对我?”回忆及此,还忍不住情绪溃堤眼泪直流,后来他跟父亲讨论,看了一学期的心理医生,也吃百忧解,度过一段几乎没有情绪起伏的日子。
炎亚纶透露,那段时间有点像“活尸”,因此停了药,虽没有明显复发状况,也觉得内心的黑洞淡化不少,但那个阴影,始终没有离开过。他抱着这段被霸凌的恨,一脚踏入娱乐圈,出道当艺人某部分原因就是:“我觉得要好好的活着,就是对他们最好的报复,我唯一想到的办法,就是让你们每天都看到我,这么不喜欢的我。”
不过,炎亚纶这段复仇之路,走到2015年,又让他遇到一个人生大危机。他当时一篇在社交网站的发文:“好一阵子没下雨,这周狂下雨把干燥的土壤淋湿,因此地质松软造成今天地震不断”,立刻在网络上发酵,还被嘲讽是地质学家“炎P”。他虽表面上不在意,却有如万箭钻心,连好友鬼鬼都曾在受访时,拿这个当玩笑话,回答问题时笑称:“这也要问我,我又不是地质学家”。
炎亚纶坦言,上述事件让这段友谊一度出现紧张,幸好两人当天晚上就通电话,把事情讲开,才解除危机,但公司那一年年会,同事竟以“地质学家”介绍,让他再度受伤。他表示,那些排山倒海的嘲讽的感觉就像是被拉回国中遭霸凌的时光,说到这又哽咽了起来,最后全靠意志力,等伤害慢慢过去,让时间冲淡一切,加上当时身边交了不少朋友,不再像儿时那般孤立无援,透过朋友开导、陪伴,才渐渐释怀,但这说来短暂,也足足消耗了他一年时间。
出道十年,炎亚纶表示早已放下仇恨,说到往事也忍不住苦笑,和同学们完全失联,近三年却接连偶遇,彷佛老天在告诉他“该放下了”,也不讳言报复成功,心里反而空荡荡的,他笑称:“看别人痛苦我好像没有比较开心,也没有赢了的感觉。”进演艺圈是本来就喜欢,报复心情只是种推进自己往前的动力罢了,现在见到国中同学也没有情绪,直言或许还有点感谢这些人:“如果他们没有给我这段历练,我就走不过地震那段时间,最糟的状况我已经看过。”
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